May is American Stroke month.  If you think you aren’t at risk of having a stroke because you are in your 20’s or 30’s you are wrong.  The following lists are taken from the American Stroke Association’s website.  Some of the risk factors can’t be changed but many of them can be changed or treated.  http://www.strokeassociation.org/

What risk factors for stroke can’t be changed?

• Age — The chance of having a stroke approximately doubles for each decade of life after age 55. While stroke is common among the elderly, a lot of people under 65 also have strokes.
• Heredity (family history) — Your stroke risk may be greater if a parent, grandparent, sister or brother has had a stroke. Some strokes may be symptoms of genetic disorders like CADASIL (Cerebral Autosomal Dominant Arteriopathy with Sub-cortical Infarcts and Leukoencephalopathy), which is caused by a gene mutation that leads to damage of blood vessel walls in the brain, blocking blood flow. Most individuals with CADASIL have a family history of the disorder — each child of a CADASIL parent has a 50% chance of inheriting the disease. Visit the NINDS website (opens in new window) or read the AHA/ASA scientific statement (opens in new window) on this topic for more details about CADASIL.
• Race — African-Americans (opens in new window) have a much higher risk of death from a stroke than Caucasians do. This is partly because blacks have higher risks of high blood pressure, diabetes and obesity.
• Sex (gender) — Each year, women have more strokes than men, and stroke kills more women than men. Use of birth control pills, pregnancy, history of preeclampsia/eclampsia or gestational diabetes, oral contraceptive use, and smoking, and post-menopausal hormone therapy may pose special stroke risks for women. Be sure to discuss your specific risks with your doctor.
• Prior stroke, TIA or heart attack — The risk of stroke for someone who has already had one is many times that of a person who has not. Transient ischemic attacks (TIAs) are “warning strokes” that produce stroke-like symptoms but no lasting damage. TIAs are strong predictors of stroke. A person who’s had one or more TIAs is almost 10 times more likely to have a stroke than someone of the same age and sex who hasn’t. Recognizing and treating TIAs can reduce your risk of a major stroke. TIA should be considered a medical emergency and followed up immediately with a healthcare professional. If you’ve had a heart attack, you’re at higher risk of having a stroke, too.

 What stroke risk factors can be changed, treated or controlled?

• High blood pressure — High blood pressure is the leading cause of stroke and the most important controllable risk factor for stroke. Many people believe the effective treatment of high blood pressure is a key reason for the accelerated decline in the death rates for stroke.
• Cigarette smoking — In recent years, studies have shown cigarette smoking to be an important risk factor for stroke. The nicotine and carbon monoxide in cigarette smoke damage the cardiovascular system in many ways. The use of oral contraceptives combined with cigarette smoking greatly increases stroke risk.
• Diabetes mellitus — Diabetes is an independent risk factor for stroke.  Many people with diabetes also have high blood pressure, high blood cholesterol and are overweight. This increases their risk even more. While diabetes is treatable, the presence of the disease still increases your risk of stroke.
• Carotid or other artery disease — The carotid arteries in your neck supply blood to your brain. A carotid artery narrowed by fatty deposits from atherosclerosis (plaque buildups in artery walls) may become blocked by a blood clot. Carotid artery disease is also called carotid artery stenosis.  
• Peripheral artery disease is the narrowing of blood vessels carrying blood to leg and arm muscles. It’s caused by fatty buildups of plaque in artery walls. People with peripheral artery disease have a higher risk of carotid artery disease, which raises their risk of stroke.
• Atrial fibrillation — This heart rhythm disorder raises the risk for stroke. The heart’s upper chambers quiver instead of beating effectively, which can let the blood pool and clot. If a clot breaks off, enters the bloodstream and lodges in an artery leading to the brain, a stroke results.
• Other heart disease — People with coronary heart disease or heart failure have a higher risk of stroke than those with hearts that work normally. Dilated cardiomyopathy (an enlarged heart), heart valve disease and some types of congenital heart defects also raise the risk of stroke.
• Sickle cell disease (also called sickle cell anemia) — This is a genetic disorder that mainly affects African-American and Hispanic children. “Sickled” red blood cells are less able to carry oxygen to the body’s tissues and organs. These cells also tend to stick to blood vessel walls, which can block arteries to the brain and cause a stroke.
• High blood cholesterol — People with high blood cholesterol have an increased risk for stroke. Also, it appears that low HDL (“good”) cholesterol is a risk factor for stroke in men, but more data are needed to verify its effect in women.
• Poor diet — Diets high in saturated fat, trans fat and cholesterol can raise blood cholesterol levels. Diets high in sodium (salt) can contribute to increased blood pressure. Diets with excess calories can contribute to obesity. Also, a diet containing five or more servings of fruits and vegetables per day may reduce the risk of stroke (PDF opens in new window).
• Physical inactivity and obesity — Being inactive, obese or both can increase your risk of high blood pressure, high blood cholesterol, diabetes, heart disease and stroke. So go on a brisk walk, take the stairs, and do whatever you can to make your life more active. Try to get a total of at least 30 minutes of activity on most or all days,

Moving through the stages of grief.

Everyday someone asks me how I'm doing, for the most part I just smile and shrug my shoulders.  It's been 4 weeks today since my dad died.  The pain in my heart has gone from being a sharp searing pain to more like a dull ache.  I picked up my dad's ashes last Tuesday and that was tough.  By Thursday I was finally ready to look at the death certificate and found something that surprised me.  The cause of death was listed as "end stage senile dementia".  He didn't have Alzheimer's so I did some research.  I found this article about how the brain behaves after a stroke, or with dementia or Alzheimer's.  It basically outlined what we've been through the last year.  I wish one of his doctors had shared this with us before I think it would have been helpful.  I have to remind myself that I was very lucky, my dad never got to the point where he didn't know me and he never lost his speech.  And as much as I miss him I know it's better that he's not trapped in his body any more. 

Below are the 5 stages of grief, it's something everyone deals with differently...

How Do We React to Grief and Loss?

There are specific stages of grief. They reflect common reactions people have as they try to make sense of a loss. An important part of the healing process is feeling and accepting the emotions that come as a result of the loss.

Here are the common stages of grief that people go through:

• Denial, numbness, and shock: Numbness is a normal reaction to a death or loss and should never be confused with "not caring." This stage of grief helps protect us from experiencing the intensity of the loss. It can be useful when we have to take some action, such as planning a funeral, notifying relatives, or reviewing important papers. As we move through the experience and slowly acknowledges its impact, the initial denial and disbelief fades.

• Bargaining: This stage of grief may be marked by persistent thoughts about what "could have been done" to prevent the death or loss. Some people become obsessed with thinking about specific ways things could have been done differently to save the person's life or prevent the loss. If this stage of grief isn't dealt with and resolved, the person may live with intense feelings of guilt or anger that can interfere with the healing process.

• Depression: In this stage, we begin to realize and feel the true extent of the death or loss. Common signs of depression in this stage include trouble sleeping, poor appetite, fatigue, lack of energy, and crying spells. We may also have self-pity and feel lonely, isolated, empty, lost, and anxious.

• Anger: This stage is common. It usually happens when we feel helpless and powerless. Anger can stem from a feeling of abandonment because of a death or loss. Sometimes we're angry at a higher power, at the doctors who cared for a lost loved one, or toward life in general.

• Acceptance: In time, we can come to terms with all the emotions and feelings we experienced when the death or loss happened. Healing can begin once the loss becomes integrated into our set of life experiences.

Throughout our lives, we may return to some of the earlier stages of grief, such as depression or anger. Because there are no rules or time limit to the grieving process, everyone's healing process is different. 

First loves, dignity, and feeling like your head is under water...

It's said that every girls first love is their dad.  For me that's 100% true.  My dad has been the one person that believed in me unconditionally.  He always told me I could do anything and that I could change the world.  (I haven't changed the world yet, but I'm sure one of my kids will).

Even though this song is written about a significant other I can relate it to my dad.... like the song I was his muse and were each others end and beginning.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mk7-GRWq7wA

 The greatest thing about my dad is that he taught me to think for myself.  That's not popular in parenting because most people want to raise clones of themselves....not Jim and not me.  One of my greatest accomplishments is that I've taught my kids to think for themselves, my dad's legacy will live on :)

Jim, wrote an Astrology column, weekly, literally until the end.  He was writing his column when the stroke happened.  When I first got to Las Vegas we had every hope of a full recovery.  I stayed for 5 days but 30 minutes after I got home the hospital called and he'd had another stroke, this one at the brain stem.  Most days he's lucid and oriented, other's not so much.  I moved him to Corona in June so we could be closer, going back and forth to Vegas was difficult and expensive.  Unfortunately, he's been in the hospital or a nursing home since April 28th.

There isn't a day that goes by that he doesn't ask if he can go home with me.  At this point there is no way because Medicare/Medical won't cover someone from hospice being here 24/7.  I'm so frustrated with our health care system! It needs a serious over-haul. I think he deserves the dignity of being home and letting go of this life the way he wants to, as heart-breaking as that is for me.

 

Fall update and why I haven't blogged in a while...

This past year my blogging has taken a back seat and I mean way back.




My dad suffered 2-3 massive strokes and I’ve become his primary caregiver.
As I watch him slowly slip away,  grief has become a wet blanket over my life.
If you’ve read “The Shack” by William Young you’ll understand what I’m  talking about.
Sure I still go to work, take care of my kids, my house, etc., but I haven’t been inspired by much in a long time.

I'm starting a class on healthy living and whole food next month and I hope to blog my way through it.  Check back for updates :)


Until next time. 
Ciao.